I've noticed less love on Humboldt County's beaches than on beaches elsewhere. And I think I have some ideas about why.
But our beaches do become home to some of the love people make. Some of this love is toxic. And some love entangles, chokes and smothers. But some love is fun! Fun love is what this story is about.
Wait ... was I saying "love" when I meant "garbage?" Oh well. I'm too lazy to go back and clean up my mess, so I hope you've understood so far.
Anyway, for example, some islands in the Southern Caribbean are downwind of large populations in Amazonia. The mainlanders lose garbage to the rivers and sea, and it blows toward the islands and accumulates on windward beaches, where locals have to deal with it. So, we are lucky we don't live close to any major population centers that handle garbage poorly.
However, much of our beach garbage does originate in far-off lands, providing fun geography lessons. In addition to the familiar U.S. brands, I've found garbage labeled in Italian, German, French and several Asian languages. In fact, on a recent day I picked up 10 plastic bottles — four were Chinese, two were Korean and one was Japanese.
Exotic beach garbage is often grouped when it comes. (Good thing I didn't say "love" that time!) I don't know if eddies spin off the Great Pacific Garbage Patch during storms or what, but different types of garbage from different countries sometimes wash up together. So, keep searching if you find a plastic fishing float from Taiwan near a bottle with Indonesian writing.
Washed-up toys are naturally fun finds because they are toys, plus they aren't currently choking a sea turtle to death. Little cars, dismembered action figures and sandcastle gear are common. Washed-up dolls always look like scenes from horror movies. And two-thirds of washed-up plastic dinosaurs are stegosauruses. (Sample size of three, with one triceratops.)
Fun garbage can be decorative or reusable. So far, I've recovered a fence-full of colorful crab trap buoys, various reusable fishing and boating gear, two glass fishing floats (and a lot of plastic ones), lots of pretty sea glass, a few vintage glass bottles and four full cans of beer (that I reused and recycled). My dogs have reused plenty of tennis balls. And I reused a Greg Noll Longboard Classic T-shirt, but no beached undergarments. (See a fun slideshow of international sea trash at northcoastjournal.com.)
I found a message in a bottle that had been tossed into Humboldt Bay two weeks previously. It had spelling and grammatical errors, but it essentially said, "If you are reading this, get a life." So, I got trolled by a message in a bottle.
Once I thought I saw a washed-up great white shark in the distance. But it turned out to be a folded mattress. It's fun to think that a honeymoon couple on a cruise ship in rough seas went FOOP! — right off the verandah. They went from making love to making garbage.
Another reason there's relatively little garbage on our local beaches is undoubtedly the beach clean-up efforts promoted by various groups and agencies, such as Surfrider and California State Parks. And the California Coastal Commission promotes an annual Coastal Clean-up Day on the third Saturday of September. Mark your calendars.
And a beach cleanup is a great way to meet like-minded garbage-hating, beach-loving individuals. If you are seeking that special someone, maybe check the Coastal Commission's website and find a group to meet up with. You just might find the garbage of your life. Wait ... I mean the love of your life!
Biologist Mike Kelly (he/him) is also the author of the book Tigerfish: Traditional and Sport Fishing on the Niger River, Mali, West Africa. It's available at Amazon or everywhere e-books are sold.